If you’ve ever tried to find a therapist, you know the process can be complicated and confusing.

You scroll, check out a few websites. You notice words like life transitions, stress, anxiety, burnout, and terms like cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), emotional regulation, internal family systems (IFS), and stress management. A few therapists likely  stand out, but you still aren’t sure who would actually be the right fit.

While it can be exhausting doing this research while managing stress, juggling work, navigating relationships, and determining what comes next in life, this is a normal part of the process.

Choosing a Therapist Isn’t Always Straightforward

Unfortunately, we dont have a formula to tells you who will feel like the right fit for you, but we do have some tips to help you make an informed decision.

While navigating practice websites, you’ll likely see a short bio and a photo, and get a general sense of preferred therapeutic approach fro each therapist.

We understand that this is a relatively small amount of information to determine who can actually help you navigate stress and challenges in your day-to-day life.

Here at HEART Counseling LLC, we offer free, 15-minute consultation calls to individuals interested in finding a therapist. These calls allow you to ask us questions and learn more about us, but also gives us an opportunity to determine if we would be a good fit for you, or if another therapist would serve you better.

It’s Okay If the First Therapist Isn’t the Right Fit

This is one of the most important things to understand early on

The first therapist you meet might not be the one you stay with, and that’s completely normal and okay.

For young adults, for example, especially for those dealing with stress or burnout, a good therapeutic fit can depend on things like:

• Whether the therapist feels relatable and easy for you to talk to

• How they understand and conceptualize work stress, overwhelm,  and the pressure to “keep it together”

• How structured or flexible your sessions feel

• Whether you feel understood after explaining everything

Even a highly skilled therapist for young adults won’t be the perfect match for all young adults.

This doesn’t mean that therapy can’t and won’t help you. It means the relationship itself matters.

You’re Allowed to Take Your Time (and “Shop Around”)

There can be unspoken pressure to pick a therapist and stick with it, but we believe therapy doesn’t and shouldn’t have to work that way.

You’re allowed to:

• Try an initial session and decide it’s not a match

• Reach out to more than one therapist in Madison WI

• Switch therapists later if your needs or preferences change

This isn’t being difficult or “picky”, it’s an important part of finding support that actually works for you.

Most therapists understand this and want you to find the right fit to get the help that you need, even if that ends up being with someone else. The National Association of Social Workers (NASW) Code of Ethics encourages clinical social workers to refer clients to more appropriate services when it is for the purposes of ensuring and prioritizing the client’s wellbeing.

Here at HEART Counseling LLC, we are always happy to hear when clients are doing their due diligence and investigating all of their options!

What a Good Fit Should Feel Like

If you find a therapist who is a good fit to work with you, don’t expect it to feel like a dramatic moment where everything instantly clicks.

It takes time to develop a trusting and understanding relationship, and we dont expect you to be a perfectly open and vulnerable person when you walk through our doors for the first, second, third, even twentieth time.

More often, it feels like:

• You can talk without overthinking every word

• You don’t feel judged or picked apart

• The therapist follows what you’re saying without forcing it into a label

• You leave feeling a little lighter, or at least more clear

Sometimes the clearest sign is simple, you might leave and think “I think I could come back here next week.”

Learn more about our approach to therapy here!

Questions You Can Ask a Potential or Current Therapist

If you’re not sure how to evaluate fit, asking a few questions can make things feel more clear.

You can ask things like:

• “Do you work with other young adults? young professionals? Adult Males? Older Females?”

• “How do you usually approach topics like stress? burnout? anxiety? trauma?”

• “What do your sessions typically look like?”

• “How do we know if therapy is helping me?”

• “What should I do if I feel like it’s not the right fit?”

 

Guiding Questions to Ask Yourself After a Consult or Session

Your own experience matters most.

After a session, you can check in with yourself by asking yourself questions like:

• Did I feel comfortable enough to be honest?

• Did I feel understood? How? Was there any time that I did not feel understood?

• Did anything feel “off” or hard to explain?

• Do I feel open to going back?

Your answers to these questions will likely never feel perfect, but, in general, are your feelings positive and steady? Is there room for improvement, or are the issues that came up irresolvable if you bring them to your therapist?

If You’re Already in Therapy and Unsure

If you’ve already started therapy and something doesn’t feel quite right, you’re not stuck.

Sometimes it helps to name it:

• “I don’t think this is fully clicking for me yet.”

• “I think I might need a different approach, can we talk about that?”

A good therapist will be open to that conversation. At HEART Counseling LLC, we actively elicit feedback from our clients on a regular basis to ensure we are serving them appropriately, and providing the best care possible.

And if it still doesn’t feel like the right fit, you’re allowed to look for a different therapist who better matches your needs.

If you feel unsatisfied with your current therapist, let them know what isn’t working first. Dont worry about how they will respond to criticism. They are professionals, and your wellbeing is their priority. Send them an email or message if you feel uncomfortable bringing this up in session.

The Goal Isn’t to Get It Perfect the First Time

Starting with a search like “therapist for young adults”, “Stress Management therapist in Middleton WI”, or even “stress therapist for young adults Madison WI” are all great places to being.

From there, the process is more about paying attention to what feels helpful over time.

Finding the right therapist for you isn’t luck, it’s about giving yourself time, patience, permission to adjust, and the freedom to make changes until you find a good place to land.

Looking for additional tips to find a mental health professional near you? Check out this advice from the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI)

• Finding a Mental Health Professional
• Types of Mental Health Professionals
• Finding the Right Mental Health Professional for you

 

Want to see if one of our therapists would be a good fit for you? Check out our several therapists here at HEART Counseling LLC!